Jonathan Niven "Jon" Cryer is best known for the role of Charlie Harper's (portrayed by Charlie Sheen) gullible brother Alan Harper in the CBS sitcom "Two and a Half Men."
When Charlie Harper died on the show (due to Charlie Sheen exiting the show), Walden Schmidt (Ashton Kutcher) moved into the house and they got married so they could legally adopt a boy.
Throughout the show, Alan has been portrayed as the exact opposite of his brother Charlie. While Charlie womanised his way through an easy life, Alan the chirpractor was about as lucky as someone who had the road in front of him crossed by a black cat while walking under a ladder and breaking mirrors. He was known for making crazy remarks and odd statements that got him into the awkardest of situations.
As Cryer, born on April 16, 1965, celebrates his 51st birthday, here are some of his best lines from "Two and a Half Men" as Alan Harper.
"I don't have money for luxuries like eating out, or eating in, really. I'm trying to learn to chew my own cud."
"Judith, if you're gonna chew my ass off, just know I'm planning on having it for breakfast tomorrow."
"Do you know the problem with sushi? It's all fleshy and flappy and wet. Feels unnatural against my tongue."
"Parenthood is like skydiving. You just gotta jump out of the old plane."
"That's funny. The way I see it, your peanut butter is all over my chocolate."
"I plan on spending Christmas Eve at a movie theatre all by myself, just so you (Charlie) can have sex tonight."
"Well, the woman's going to be your mother-in-law, you (his son, Jake) might as well get used to it. Remember the time she rode out of Betty Ford on a lawn mower?"
"I didn't do the dog people-style."
"Let me just get Charlie's personal stuff out of here. Oh, here is some of his unfinished music. Um... panties. Panties... Panties... Water-pipe... Oh, vibrator."
"Well, since we're talking about your (Charlie) private area, it can be anything from Ebola to mad cow disease."
Source: IMDb
